“But He NEEDED to go through Samaria.”

Jesus was tired. He had been walking for days, the miles showing in his worn-down sandals and dirty, blistered feet. He slowly sat down next to Jacob’s well. I imagine the sweat trickling down his forehead as he wiped his brow, let out a sigh, and took off one shoe and then the other. Yes, he was fully God, but he was fully man, and after two days of walking, he was beat.

It was the noon – the middle of the day, when the blazing middle eastern sun rode high in the sky. Contrasted against the rays approached a Samaritan woman, balancing her water jar against her hip. While most of the town’s women came to the well before sunrise or after sunset to avoid the heat, she came now. She wanted to avoid the judging glares and hushed whispers from the others. She was no saint. She had already made her way through five different husbands, and was now living with another man. To say she was the town’s skank was no lie.

With a hum on her lips, and her dark locks falling in her face, she busied herself filling the jar. Jesus looked up at her, and calmly spoke.

“Give me a drink.”

The Samaritan woman stopped in her tracks. Her jaw dropped open. In her shock, she spilled some water. Jesus was clearly a Jewish man. And yet he spoke to her, a Samaritan woman! The Jews despised the Samaritans. It was more than a fun-loving high school rivalry. The Jews viewed the Samaritan as half-breeds. They weren’t pure Jews. Years earlier, a group of Jews had intermarried with pagans and produced childrens who were not fully Jews – the Samaritans.

A righteous Jew would not speak to a Samaritan, much less stay at their houses or eat with their utensils. In fact, traveling from Galilee to Judea (as Jesus was doing), a righteous Jew would go out of his way – we’re talking miles out of his way to avoid Samaria all together.

Yet, with one spoken sentence, Jesus smashes through every stereotype and judgment. He cares for this woman. He knows; knows how lost she is; how many regrets she has. He knows that she comes to this well every day, alone. He knows she is the town outcast. He has seen her every tear. He loves her and He wants to offer her…more.

“Those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.”

With one conversation Jesus changes the woman’s life. Yes, he deals with her sin, but he offers her a greater life – an offer she can’t turn down. Now a new person, she rushes off, forgetting her water jar in the dust. Hours earlier, she kept to herself, but now she runs through town yelling, “Come and see!”

“Many Samaritans from that town believed in him because of the woman’s testimony.”

What is your Samaria? It’s the place that everyone else would avoid, and if truth be told, you would avoid it at all costs too?

For me, Samaria was this entire year of my life. It was an emotional breakdown in the Applebee’s parking lot; my black tank top and jeans hanging off of me from so much weight loss. I cried as I realized that the wedding vows spoken to me by a man I trusted had been broken. Samaria was packing away over 4 years of memories like packing away photo albums in cardboard boxes. Samaria was a self-built house of humiliation. Samaria was realizing I could not afford my home by myself – constant, never ending financial stress. Samaria was finding a job outside of ministry – to heal and take care of my financial obligations. Samaria was trusting God when I couldn’t see past two feet in front of me.

I’m so glad God doesn’t warn us before tragedy hits. If He did, I would have said, “No way God – I’m not traveling through that.”

Jesus didn’t have to go through Samaria. He could’ve avoided it and went along with the status quo. BUT, there was a woman there waiting for him.There’s a reason – maybe many reasons why I had to go through my “Samaria”. There’s a reason why you have to go through Samaria.

Had I not gone through Samaria, I would not be the woman I am today – stronger, steadfast. Had my life not coming crashing down I would have missed God’s man for me. A man who cherishes me and helps me hold my head up. I would not know the joys of life long friendships with girls who feel more like sisters than friends.

There was someone waiting for Jesus in Samaria and there’s blessing for you there too. I read an article from Samaritan’s Purse today (read it here —> http://tinyurl.com/44qlwbk) and borrowing what one Tornado victim said after her house was blown away, but she rededicated her life to Christ, “I haven’t lost anything. I’ve gained everything.”

The story of the Samaritan woman is my favorite story in the Bible. You can read it in John 4.

This will be one of the most difficult posts I’ve ever written. Forgiveness. It goes against the very framework of who we are as human beings. It seems like a term that could never possibly be comprehended or executed. I heard once that at the root of the word in the Greek, it means to “act as though it never happened”. Why does it seem like God always sets the bar so high, that it’s completely impossible to achieve His standard?

Everytime I thought about forgiving the man that had wronged me so horribly, it was like a bitter taste in my mouth. It made me sick. How could God expect me to forgive him? Even if I decided to put on a super-spiritual mask and make some emotional decision at a church alter, I knew it wouldn’t be real. It would be just that…a quick, emotional, fickle decision. I’m not one to make a half-hearted decision. It’s just not in my DNA.

I knew what Jesus taught about forgiveness. I knew that as a Christian I was supposed to forgive. And not only to forgive, but to forgive over and over again. I mean, Jesus forgave me, and my sin killed him, right? It wasn’t just that I knew I was supposed to forgive – I wanted to forgive! But, God couldn’t POSSIBLY ask that of me. Not after everything I endured. Couldn’t He give me the one right – to just be ANGRY!? To say I literally battled and toiled over this would be the greatest understatement ever declared. It was my cross to bear.

I had not only been wronged, but I felt as though I had been wronged worse than anyone.had.ever.been.wronged.before.since.HISTORY.BEGAN. The lies. The deception. The hurt. The misery. No, God, couldn’t expect me to forgive. I was resolute.

But, the crazy part about being a Christian. I mean, not just calling yourself by that title, but being inhabited by the very presence of God…He won’t let you stay the same. He won’t let you stay in your sin. He is never content with where you’re at. He calls you to do that which you do not think is possible. He chips away at you, until you reflect the image of the Son.

 

And then, a few days ago, I did the unthinkable. I sent a letter to that man. The man I had cried a thousand tears over. The man that I begged God to judge. The man I wanted to hurt because he hurt me. I sent him a letter telling him that I forgave him. It didn’t diminish the hurt I had endured. But, I penned the words in a spirit of forgiveness, rather than hate. I didn’t know if he would receive it. But it didn’t matter.

And something funny happened – a peace flooded my soul. “I forgive you.” Probably, the hardest words in the English language to form on the lips and articulate. It goes against everything we are. However, I know without a doubt, they are the most freeing words ever spoken. I have never felt more free.

And more shocking – I actually realized my faults. What I had done wrong. What I could have done better. And I said three more powerful words: “I am sorry.”

Wow. I feel like shouting and telling the whole world. This is what my faith about. It’s about doing things that arn’t normal. That arn’t even possible with HIS help. It took me nearly 8 months, because I’m not perfect. But, I’m able to forgive now. I’m human. I will probably still battle anger for just a bit. But forgiveness is so much more powerful than hate.

I will still hurt. I will still occassionally grieve over the pain and the loss; what should have been. But yet, isn’t that what God feels every time His eyes drop to this earth and He gazes at His precious children? We are so incredibly talented at screwing up what He meant for good. From the very beginning of the world, starting with Adam and Eve. How many times does God think back to that day and simply sigh over WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN?! Yet, even when all was lost, He still had a plan. He was anxiously awaiting the moment His Son would be sent to rescue humanity.

I’m learning so much about the heart of my Father. So much about what a failure I am and not just because I’m divorced, but because I’m a sinner. But how He still works. I serve a great, great God.